What are your Credentials?

On September 2, 2017, Posted by , In Personal, By ,,,, , With No Comments

Firstly, this is a fair question!

What makes me able to label myself a way that makes me an authority on sex? How do I know what I know, and do I know enough?

If you want to work with me, it is completely understandable to want to know my background and where I come from.

Why I chose to be an expert on SEX

I have been completely head over heels for learning more about sex and sexuality since I watched “Look Who’s Talking” and “Look Who’s Talking too”. I was around 5, when I loudly to an entire restaurant told my mom that boys have penises and girls have a vagina. (I know better now, simply put most boys have a penis and a scrotum and most girls have a vulva and a vagina)

Speed ahead to my pre teeny bopper and early teen years, I watched Sunday Night with Sue Johansen answer questions with honesty, humour, and happiness. It was my moms version of “The Sex Talk” and it was perfect. I wanted (and still want) to be her when I grew up.

I loved Sex Ed in school. When other kids were giggling or cringing I was staring on with intense interest. When we watched a birth, I cried joyful tears as others covered their eyes. Sue Johansen and my sex ed teachers were nurses, but I didn’t want to be a nurse (no shade on nurses, it’s a respectful career that I admire).

In high school, when I did express interest in pursuing Sex Science, I was told that I was inappropriate by teachers. I was also told that research was all math, and math and I are not on speaking terms.

I kept the dream inside, thinking it was impossible to achieve. I still gave advice to friends, usually dispelling harmful myths the boys were telling. (Yes, you can get pregnant the first time you have sex. There are different sizes of condoms you can find one that fits. Yes, you can get pregnant on your period. There is no shame in saying no, there is no shame is saying yes.)

When I started to have partnered sex (which was after high school), something was off. I thought sex was something that was done to me and I would just naturally enjoy it and be good at it. NOPE! Like most college aged women I rated my sexual experiences by how much fun my partner had. So I learned to fake how much fun I was having to make their sexual experience better.

It felt hollow, and like I was missing out on something. I knew how to “do stuff” but that didn’t make the pleasure any better. I tried different things, I went along with whatever came my way.

When I took Gender Studies, things started to make more sense. The messages I was told, were different from what my male partners were told and that shaped our experiences. I understood some of the things I went with were not what I consented to and that that wasn’t my fault. I didn’t and do not want any one else to experience that, it’s unfortunate and heartbreaking but so many do.

It wasn’t until I moved in with my now husband that I had my first orgasm, and I cried! I was shocked, I had resigned to thinking I was just broken and my body just didn’t do that. It could, and it can experience amazing pleasure when I am in an environment of trust and openness (now I orgasm frequently and easily).

I graduated University, I got pregnant with our first, we got married, had another baby. I tried to go back to work and it wasn’t panning out (I liked my job, but I wasn’t taking anything home any money after paying for childcare, and I was missing my kids).

I needed something I could do from home. I wanted to do something I was passionate about, something that helped people, that had the potential to leave this world a better place than I found it.

That’s when I found out about Sex Coaching (Euphoric Epiphany formally reconized as a business November 2015). I will be completely honest with you, I have no extensive formal training. A lot of books read, a bundle of experience, and a fiery passion to know more.

I am a grass roots, self taught, sex coach. Do I know more than someone with a doctorate, no! I do know my stuff. I live and breathe to learn and educate more about sex, sexuality, gender, and other intersectional subjects. I have read, practised, and did a lot of internal work to get to where I am now. (PS we also had our third child in 2017)

Those who are in my Sex Education industry can vary from self taught to having several masters and doctorate degrees:

Reid Mihalko has an arts degree, created cuddle parties and is now one of the more successful sex educators.

Dawn Serra started out with a business degree and was selling sex toys on the side. Now she does so much more than just teach about sex, but also social skills (because sex is a social skill).

Tristan Taramino has a degree in American studies and now is an author of over 8 books. She also runs a Sex Educator Boot Camp.

Bianca Laureano is an activist with a degree in Women’s Health and Latino Communities and received her Master of Arts degree in Human Sexuality Education in 2002, and in 2006 got another Masters of Women’s Studies (with a focus on race).

Dr. Shannon Boodram is a clinical sexologist and a successful YouTuber.

And there are so many more AMAZING Sex Educators/Therapists/Counsellors/Coaches out there that I can’t name them all.

We all have different paths and specialties, but we all are working towards a more inclusive, comprehensive, and holistic sexual health approach for all.

Let’s talk about what I am not

  • I am not a medical doctor.
  • I am not a sex therapist/sexologist.
  • I am not a sex surrogate.

There has been moments in my career when I have referred clients to seek the expertise of those above. I am never afraid to say “I don’t know” or “I am not the best person to help you”.

What am I

  • Sex Coach. I work with you and your goals and provide you with knowledge, support, and tools to reflect and work towards those goals and shift if necessary. I create programs, worksheets, challenges to expand your mind from what is “normal” to what is “possible” when it comes to your sexuality, sex and relationships.
  • Good Sex Ambassador. I use my platform to provide information and encouragement for all people to have more ENJOYABLE sex. This platform is also used to highlight and encourage change for other social injustice issues.
  • Mom. And that is why this is taking so long to write!

 

What I have papers for

Things I want papers for in the future

You are welcome to assist me in my educational goals monetarily: paypal.me/EuphoricEpiphany

Appearances as expert

If you have any further questions or concerns please do not hesitate to email me. Victoria@EuphoricEpiphany.com

 

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